Simoundou Chronicles - Part 2

(continued from Simoundou Chronicles - Part 1)

"I know they may want to kill me" said the President. "I have taken certain steps to minimize the risk, I can't tell you about them now. But in the unlikely even that I don't come back alive, there is this dependable leader who will look after the country until the next election. And here he comes!"

With that he turned to to right. Just then Ranil wickremasinghe walked in from the right hand side of the stage smiling and waving to the dumbstruck journalists.

"But Ranil is not even part of the government! He is your sworn enemy! And more importantly he is a born loser!"

"I have made an agreement with the Ranil. He is perfect for this job. Besides, how can we expect to make peace with Prabha if we can't even make peace with the leader of the opposition? But most importantly, as you all know, Ranil is the real leader of this country my dear friends! I am only a fake! So he is not a loser. He actually won the last presidential election."

With that the president paused, smiling. There was not a word from the journalists. The president continued.

"You all know how I "won" the last election. The LTTE cheated. They helped me by preventing millions of Tamils from voting. The results of the election did not really reflect the will of the people. It only reflected the will of the LTTE. Ranil would be the president now had the election been free and fair. So he IS the real leader of the country. The one chosen by the people."

"But will the parliament support this?"

"Of course it will! . Ranil's men will agree to this. And my men, who are a bunch of corrupt fools, will agree to anything as long as they continue to be minsters."

"But if you want to do something unconstitutional, you will need a 2/3 majority in parliament. Can you get that many mps to back you Mr president?"

"If I don't get enough backing then I will buy a few more mps from the opposition. All I need to do is to make them ministers!"

"But there aren't any vacancies for ministers Mr President! We already have too many ministers don't we? In fact we have the world record for the highest number of ministries! much higher than even India and China who have huge populations! "

"Well I will create a few by moving some existing ministers to some new ministries, the ministry of Hair Dressing and Cosmetic Affairs for Wimal, The ministry of Waste ,Corruption and inefficiency for a number of others. I will move Mervin to The Ministry of Thugs and Violent Affairs and Rohitha to the "Ministry of Oral disaster creation and mismanagement". Then there is "the ministry of Spineless LTTE Lap Dogs" for the TNA mps and "the ministry of double crossing" for GL peiris. That will free up a lot of existing ministries for new comers. you see?" Then there is also this "Ministry of Imagination and Fairy Tales" for Kehaliya.

"But Mr President, The whole idea seems ridiculous, I mean we are in the middle of a war, And we are making progress, and all of a sudden you want to go to Kilinochi to talk to the leader of the LTTE! They are exploding bombs in Colombo and killing civilians but you are willing to negotiate with terrorists! You said we should wipe out terrorism and..."

"Sorry to interrupt! The press conference is over! I wish I could spend more time with you but I just don't have enough time. So good bye!"

"But Mr President, Just one more question...."

But the president just walked away.

Meanwhile far away from all this, in Prabha's air conditioned bunker in an unknown location in the North, Prabha is eating 'Thosai' while watching "Iron Man" in a 42 inch plasma screen as Pottu walks in.

"Come Pottu! This looks damned good! If we could get one of those high tech suits, we can knock the hell out of those stupid Sinhalese Suckers!"

"Yes sir, But we'd need a smaller size as now we have mostly kids"

"Is that true Pottu? Do you think he is serious about coming here? I mean that fool Rajapakse?"

"I don't know yet, But I am quite surprised by this move sir!"

"Me too Pottu! I think this is another gimmick by that dog Rajapakse! May be just to appease those stupid foreign idiots!"

"May be sir, But if he is serious, he won't go back alive. will he?" Pottu asked with an evil smile.

(to be continued)